


Unsterblich

by fraufi666



Category: Hetalia - Fandom
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Brother/Brother Incest, Cold War, Communism, Explicit Language, Human Names, Incest, M/M, Male Slash, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Romance, Sibling Incest, Suicide Attempt, Suspense, Torture, Violence, World War II
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-24
Updated: 2014-06-24
Packaged: 2018-02-06 01:15:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1839049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fraufi666/pseuds/fraufi666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prussia has been escaping from a traumatising time in the east. As he arrives closer to his own country, he witnesses the fall of the Berlin wall and is found by his younger brother. But as Germany brings Prussia home, he notices that many things have changed about the confident brother he once knew. Will he be able to revive his brother to the way things used to be, or will all be lost like the Prussian kingdom?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unsterblich

He had been running for hours. His bruised body and blistered feet were grim reminders of the havoc that he was trying to escape from. But regardless of all his body’s signals, the white-haired Prussian forced himself to continue on. 

Only another mile, Gilbert told himself. He had to keep going if he wanted to survive. Wheezing from exhaustion, he picked up his pace as he continued his tiring journey. 

Finally, when he could not bear it any longer, Gilbert had collapsed right in the middle of his tracks. With his back against a wall, he sobbed. Everything was over now. The Empire that had been his whole life, the pride in his family and the very blood in his veins. It slowly bled from him painfully, as if a fatal wound which had no way of being cured. He looked up for the first time ahead of himself to see how much he had lost. 

A wasteland filled his vision, now blurred with tears. No matter where he looked, all traces of the once powerful kingdom had been destroyed. Rubble was all that remained. 

”Forgive me, Old Fritz…” he whispered in a hushed sob, addressing an important figure who had deceased long ago, the very one who had built the kingdom “I have let you down. I have let everyone down. There is nothing left anymore…” Tears were filling up in his eyes, yet Gilbert refused to let them go. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this, not that they would have recognised him anyway. Rags now replaced the pristine sharp and blue uniform that he once wore, while his usually silvery hair was dirtied to a dull grey. Yet it was not just the clothes that had altered his appearance, for when Gilbert had stood up, his frail legs shook. He had lost a significant amount of weight, which had transformed a highly esteemed Prussian leader into a walking skeleton. He had once been handsome and strong, just like the kingdom but now he was reduced into almost nothing but skin and bones. Closing his eyes, the only thing, which had remained strong in him, were all of the horrific memories of his time with the enemy. 

“Come now…” coaxed a low voice, heavily laced in a Russian accent “There’s no need to be afraid. I do you favour. You do what I say and we all live.” 

A gloved hand moved towards Gilbert’s face as a tall coated figure leaned closer. The Prussian tried to run away, but he remained transfixed in fear, the hand closing over his eyes to embody him in darkness. Rich laughter filled his ears; the worst sound he had ever heard. “No.” Gilbert pleaded, “No! Please…NO!” 

His eyes fluttered open and he breathed a sigh of relief after realising that he was in his country, rather than in enemy territory. The laughter also seemed to sound more lively and pleasant. As Gilbert looked around, he noticed that the street was filled with people, cheering and crying of joy. They began to smash at the wall that he was leaning against, using as many tools as possible. But even though it was clearly a liberating event, Gilbert’s heart felt no joy for he could not connect this event with anything he remembered. Suddenly, a forklift came driving in. The driver angrily tooted the horn at Gilbert who was still lying on the ground. He continued to lie where he was, still taking some time to fully register what was really going on. 

”Get off the ground, you idiot!” he shrieked “Do you want to die?!” 

Startled, Gilbert sprung up and tried to scurry away, yet a sea of people blocked his way. A woman shoved him to one side as she tried to push her way to the wall. 

”Wait! Fräulein.” Gilbert called “Please, tell me what is this all about.” The woman turned to him, surprised at his obvious disorientation. 

”Ha, you need to get with the times.” she scoffed, scanning Gilbert from head to toe “It’s the unification with the west, don’t you know? Also…it’s way too late to be calling anyone Fräulein. Did you come out of a time capsule?” 

Red eyes widened as he heard the woman’s words. The unification with the west. Why did that sound so familiar to him? His heart began to flutter weakly, as if something he was very fond of had suddenly seized him.

West. 

His heart took a major leap as dozens of memories came flooding through, almost as if the word had pulled the plug that was blocking all his memories. 

”West…” The word stumbled out of his bruised lip clumsily as his eyes filled with tears once more. In his mind, a young blond man with piercing blue eyes who he had loved with all his heart smiled back at him. He tried to return the smile, but his lips ached as he did so. 

Gilbert struggled to get through the crowd, realising that what he had wanted was behind the very wall that they were knocking down. Somewhere standing behind the wall was his younger brother, who he had raised and cared for deeply. Gilbert knew that this young man was doing well, or at least a lot better than he was. There was still hope, he realised. The old kingdom may have been long gone, but Germany was still there. 

Like a plague, the people flooded uncontrollably through to the wall as the opening grew bigger. In the midst of all the screaming and cheering, Gilbert had almost lost his bearings. Many hands roughly shoved him aside and he fell to the ground once more. He cried as someone had carelessly trampled over his back and he closed his eyes. Maybe this place wasn’t for me after all. He thought sadly, now more accepting of his fate. 

But before he was about to give up, two strong hands grabbed at his shoulders and pulled him up and out of the crowd. It happened so quickly that Gilbert had no time to react. As he was placed on the ground, a tall figure drew closer. The Prussian shook slightly, anxious that it was his enemy, but a glimpse at a pair of piercing blue eyes had completely reassured him. 

The young blond-haired man that had brought him so much joy was now sitting directly in front of him. He had looked even more handsome than Gilbert had last remembered and the happiness within his being grew. 

”Bruder…” Gilbert whispered, stretching out a bony hand to touch the man’s cheek, just to make sure that he wasn’t a figment of his imagination. As soon as his hand had made contact with skin instead of air, he had fainted in a mix of joy and exhaustion. 

”Oh Gilbert.” Ludwig sighed, holding the collapsed Prussian in his arms. “I’m glad I found you too…” 

After Ludwig had taken Gilbert back to his house, the older man had fallen asleep right as soon as his head had touched the pillow. The blond stared back at the sleeping albino, his mind filled with anxiety. On one hand, he was more than relieved that his brother had survived, but at the same time there was something about him that was unnerving to look at. Since their reunion, Gilbert was much skinnier and frail than ever before. Veins jolted out from beneath the flesh, which had become even whiter, almost translucent as if it had never seen the sun. Under messy grey hair, his closed eyes were dark and hollowed, reminiscent to that of a skeleton. Even in the half-light, most of the Prussian’s bruises were still noticeable. Ludwig edged closer to the emaciated figure that was left of his brother and placed a hand over Gilbert’s bony one. The Prussian flinched slightly in his sleep, but Ludwig hushed him, not wanting him to get up. He understood that the other needed strength. Waking him would not do any good. 

What have they done to you, Gilbert? Ludwig asked internally. It broke his heart to see his once pride-filled brother completely reduced in such a way. It was cruel. He felt bitter for not only Russia’s role in the war, but also with how much they had ruthlessly destroyed and taken away his brother’s dignity. A lump rose in his throat as he continued to look at Gilbert. He wanted to apologise to him. It all seemed as if he had something to do with it. It was Ludwig’s choice after all to accept America’s assistance*, yet he did not even notice what the east was planning to do with Gilbert. He wanted answers, but since the Prussian seemed so peaceful in his sleep, he did not want to bring up any traumatising memories. 

Someday…Ludwig thought. Someday he will confront Gilbert about what had happened in those days in the east. But not now. It was way too soon. 

The next day, Gilbert still lay in his bed, too weak to get up. Ludwig entered the room with some breakfast and sat down beside him. 

”Guten Morgen, West..” Gilbert smiled, wincing in pain as he did so. He placed a hand on the blond’s shoulder but the German seemed unfazed. 

”What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue?” Ludwig kept his eyes downcast, knowing that if he looked at the Prussian he would only feel more worried. 

”What the hell is wrong with you?” Gilbert’s voice rose suddenly “You haven’t said a word to me since we came home…” 

”I…” Ludwig began but turned away, anxious that he was going to hurt his brother’s feelings “I just don’t want you to use up your energy..” 

Knowing very well that Ludwig was hiding something, Gilbert struggled to sit up and face the younger sibling “Look at me, West. What’s wrong? Does my appearance disgust you so much? LOOK AT ME!” 

At this rate, Ludwig was staring directly at the Prussian. For the first time, he had noticed the tears that were beginning to fill up in Gilbert’s red eyes. “Do I repulse you?” The albino asked, his voice trembling. He was blinking quickly, struggling to hold back the tears. Even without a mirror, Gilbert knew how ghastly he looked. Ludwig continued to stare at the expression, stunned and at a loss for words. He wanted to hold him in his arms, but at the same time he wanted to scold him for acting so childish. Regardless of how Gilbert had looked, Ludwig still loved him. As he was trying to think of a way to reply, the Prussian had grabbed the tray of breakfast in a fit of rage and threw it, causing a plate to whiz in the air dangerously, narrowly missing Ludwig. 

”GET OUT!” he screamed, “I AM NOT WEAK. I DON’T NEED YOUR PITY! GET OUT!” 

Ludwig was out of the door before he could hear anymore. He was shaking, not only due to shock from the sudden outburst, but also in worry. Gilbert had changed so much, far too much for what was healthy. The thought terrified Ludwig. I have to help him…He thought firmly…Otherwise who else will? 

He lingered in the corridor for a while to regain his composure. Then, he re entered Gilbert’s room once more, carrying some detergent and a cloth. The Prussian had fallen asleep in exhaustion so Ludwig had got on his knees and started cleaning the mess. After he had thrown all the shattered ceramics into the bin, he arrived back with some lunch. 

”Gilbert…” Ludwig gently nudged the sleeping albino “Please eat something.” Reluctantly, Gilbert opened his eyes and sat up to take the lunch. Seeing the worn-out expression on Ludwig’s face had created a sudden stab of guilt. 

"Es tut Mir leid, Ludwig." Gilbert answered in a quiet voice "I shouldn’t have snapped at you…"

“Don’t worry about it.” The German said dismissively “Just eat…Bitte.” 

The Prussian wolfed the sandwich down without hesitation. He also devoured the wurst that was left on the plate gratefully. Realising that Gilbert had been starving for so long, Ludwig quickly offered him another portion. 

”It’s good to see that you have an appetite.” Ludwig replied, handing over a plate to Gilbert. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask of you but…” 

The albino looked up, the colour of his face returning, “What is it, West? You can tell me…” 

”I..” Ludwig furrowed his brow as he tried to carefully choose his words “I just want to know…What happened? After the war, I mean… The wall had made it difficult to find you. How did you get out?” Gilbert froze at the questions. The German turned down in embarrassment, inwardly cursing himself for asking too soon. He was about to brush it off, until the albino took a deep breath and began to answer. “Do you really want to know this?” Gilbert asked, “It’s not one of my most heroic exploits.” As Ludwig continued to frown, Gilbert forced a chuckle to settle the mood. The last thing he wanted to do was to show weakness, especially to his successful brother. “Well Ivan’s food was awful. And we were never allowed outdoors. But I managed to escape without him finding out. It was hard, but I disguised myself as a Russian soldier and made my way over the border. I even beat up a few guards who got in my way..” A smile, too wide for his face appeared as he said this. The journey of escape was untrue of course, but it sounded better that what had really happened. 

Ludwig gazed at the Prussian in disbelief. “No Gilbert…that wasn’t exactly what I was asking. I want to know the truth. Please tell me everything from the start.” 

Gilbert sighed, feeling slightly lousy “I’m too tired for this, West. Could we just forget it ever happened?” 

Ludwig gave in, sensing the other’s discomfort. ”Fine…” He decided “But before you go back to sleep, you need to get cleaned up.” 

Gilbert struggled to get up, yet as soon as his feet touched the floor, his knees buckled and he fell. Ludwig rushed to his aid, but the albino pushed him away. “I can get up myself!” he shouted, his voice high-pitched and shaky. He pulled himself up once more and hobbled slowly to the bathroom. 

After a couple of minutes, Ludwig knocked on the bathroom door. He had a fresh set of clothes ready for him and didn’t want to intrude in case this would anger the Prussian more. “Gilbert?” Ludwig called. To his anxiety, there was no reply. After calling him once more, he opened the door. Nothing would prepare him for what he was about to witness. 

As he entered the bathroom, the first thing he noticed was how slippery the floor was. The tap screeched as the water was turned on full-pelt. Steam clouded around the over-flowing tub. In a panic, Ludwig raced to the bath and turned off the tap. Gilbert laid submerged, white hair bobbing beneath the water.

No…Ludwig dreaded inwardly. Gilbert, why?! 

”GILBERT!” He shouted. Pulling him out of the water, the German frantically placed his hand on his neck, searching and hoping for a pulse. To his relief, Gilbert’s heart was still beating. With that, the albino opened his eyes, the scarlet pools shiny with tears. 

”Ludwig…Why didn’t you let me die?” The Prussian sobbed, finally losing control of holding back his tears “Why?!” 

Horrified at his words, Ludwig grabbed him by the shoulders and stared at him fiercely, his blue eyes blazing. Gilbert suddenly felt so small. 

”I don’t want to hear you talk like that again, do you understand?!” The blond yelled. “Gott verdammt, you idiot. Why would you do something so stupid?” 

”Because I’m an idiot!” Gilbert snapped back in bitter agreement “I’m an idiot who lost the kingdom. Are you happy now? You are the winner in all of this. I’m nothing. You have triumphed over your older brother! So let me die instead, like I was meant to, back in the east.” 

”Shut up!” Ludwig shouted “How the hell would you saying these childish things make me feel better? I didn’t know, Gilbert. And I still don’t know what happened to you. I couldn’t find you. No matter how hard I tried, it was difficult. So don’t ever, ever say that I am the winner, because I am not! Do you really think that I had a choice in this?” Gilbert’s eyes widened as he heard his brother’s shouts “…You were looking for me?” 

The German nodded hastily, fighting back the tears “Ja, you dummkopf. Of course I was. Do you really think that I was going to rebuild our nation alone?” he continued to stare at the other’s teary gaze “…I need you.” he said firmly “If you give up, we’ll lose all hope. Don’t ever do that again.” 

”Oh bruder…” Gilbert wept, moving closer to the German. Ludwig blushed, realising that the older man was still naked, but he refused to move away. He feared that if he had even let go of him for a second, the Prussian might break. He was much too fragile now. Ludwig wrapped his arms around the albino’s frail form. Now that Gilbert was completely exposed, Ludwig could feel every bone poking through his flesh and he felt even guiltier. For the first time in a while, a tear seeped down the blond’s cheek as the Prussian’s bony hands rested on his shoulders. 

They embraced there, on the wet floor for several minutes. It seemed as if they would stay that way, until Gilbert’s body began shaking violently. Feeling the tremor, Ludwig quickly wrapped a towel around the Prussian and led him out of the bathroom. 

After Gilbert had changed into some fresh clothes, Ludwig helped him to bed. The nightshirt hung awkwardly around the Prussian’s shoulders, clearly too big for him. Looking at him, it was obvious that Gilbert desperately needed more food and some adequate exercise. Ludwig thought carefully about this as he pulled up the sheets of the blanket and tucked them around the albino. Perhaps if he helped Gilbert to recover physically, it might actually assist to improve his mental state of mind. 

”Gute nacht bruder.” Ludwig said, giving Gilbert a kiss on the forehead. “Sleep well. We have a big day ahead of us.” 

”What do you mean, West?” Gilbert asked lazily, but Ludwig was already out of the room. Alone in the dark, he chuckled. If there was one thing that never changed about Ludwig, it was always his secrecy. Yet even without hearing his answer, Gilbert knew that he was in for something strenuous. 

Small shafts of light filtered through the bars and the albino opened his eyes. He was back in the dungeon, his ankle shackled to a large ball chain. 

“I’ll get you for this!” he shouted fiercely, shaking a fist at the bars in the ceiling. Ivan was all behind it, and yet earlier on, Gilbert wouldn’t have suspected him. Ivan was eccentric, but never in a million years would Gilbert see that he was crazy enough to snatch him in the dead of night, knock him out and then trap him in an underground dungeon. 

”We had a deal!” he shrieked “Don’t you remember?!” The Russian’s familiar jovial features suddenly came into view from within the bars. “Ah, Gilbert.” He called back with a grin. “No, I haven’t forgotten deal. But I’m afraid that you have forgotten your end of it.” 

”Get me out of here!” Gilbert cried “I know I made a mistake, but that’s no excuse to take me away! Bist du Verrückt?!” 

”I’m sorry, but I don’t understand Fascist language. Nor do I condone it. But since it is your first day, I can let you off.” Ivan peered down at the Prussian enthusiastically, clearly excited at the position of power that he had regained. 

“I don’t care!” Gilbert spat rudely, taking advantage of the language barrier and Ivan’s ignorance “…Mutterficker Russland.” 

Ivan continued to smile “Now these are two words I know. Gilbert is very naughty.” He turned around and gestured someone to come closer. A young woman with long hair, of a similar lightness to Ivan’s was by his side. 

”Meet my sister, Natalia. She is very pretty, isn’t she? You will be able to have fun together.” 

”What?” Gilbert sputtered, suddenly feeling sick. Normally he wouldn’t have objected to such an idea. Ivan was right, she was quite attractive…but being held captive, Gilbert knew that this wasn’t going to be a pleasant experience. 

"Natalia, I’ll leave you to it." Ivan said finally and with that he walked away.

The young girl scowled, her pleasant features immediately turning wicked. Without much ado, she began unlocking and lifting the barred door. Slowly, she climbed down the wall until she was standing before the Prussian. Fear began to plague Gilbert’s mind. ”Ivan….Ivan!” He trembled “You can’t leave me here with her! Ivan!” 

Natalia placed her hands over Gilbert’s mouth, blocking his cries. “He can’t hear you, you fool.” she snarled “Now, get on the bed and do exactly what I say…or I’ll rip your Prussian vital regions off you.” 

Gilbert struggled; trying to get away yet the ball chain was holding him in place. 

"Let me go," He begged, "I won’t tell anyone about this. Please?"

”Shut your mouth.” The girl answered “And get on the bed. Hurry up!” Gilbert slowly climbed onto the bed. Surely she wasn’t going to do anything too serious. She was after all, infatuated with someone else. Gilbert knew this from all the rumours that his soldiers had been telling him. Natalia, the gorgeous girl from Belarus, had turned down almost every man who had asked her out. The only person, they said, who would she would ever love, was Ivan. 

”What are you playing at?” Natalia snapped, interrupting his thoughts “Take off your clothes!” The Prussian slowly removed his garments, until he was left with his underwear. Hesitantly, he began to remove them off as well, but Natalia stopped him. 

”That’s enough.,” she said, much to his relief “If you think that I ever want to sleep with you, think again.”

Reaching into her apron, she pulled out what had looked like a roll of tape. But as she unrolled it, Gilbert’s heart started to beat faster. It was a cane. 

Pushing Gilbert roughly against the wall, she shoved a heel directly into his lower back, causing him to gasp. Natalia took a mighty swing and whipped the albino’s back. It continued for a while, until he was sure that he could feel blood pouring down his body. He winced, closing his eyes against the pain. If he had even shown one sign of weakness, his reputation would be in ruins. Nobody would take me seriously if they had found that a girl had beaten me, Gilbert thought apprehensively. 

”That’s what you get…Mutterficker.” Natalia said, the one German expletive jolting out hideously against the Belarusian accent. With that, she shoved him back down on the bed and finally left him alone. Back stinging with an unbearable pain, the Prussian buried his face into the pillow. 

Suddenly, a hand touched his shoulder. In his defence, he rolled away, hugging himself to protect his back from more lashes. “Stop, please…” he begged. Before he could move another inch, two strong arms were wrapped around him. It was surprisingly comforting and a lot less threatening than what Natalia would do. 

”Shh, it’s okay Gilbert. It’s only me.” Ludwig whispered. The Prussian opened his eyes and spun around, remembering that he was safely at home. 

”Ludwig…” Gilbert gasped in relief, his eyes resting on his brother. He couldn’t contain his gratitude for the German saving him and his bony hands were clutching onto the muscular arms. “Oh mein gott…Thank goodness it’s you.” He was out of breath and sweating as if he had run a marathon. 

”You’re safe now.” Ludwig said reassuringly and Gilbert’s heart rate slowed down, knowing that he could believe this man’s every word. Yet one part of him knew that there was no escape from this trauma. 

The next day Ludwig was barking orders fiercely as Gilbert weakly jogged his way up the field. “Another lap!” Ludwig shouted, the first rays of sunlight illuminating his blond hair. It gave him even more of a powerful aura and the sight only made Gilbert feel even more inferior. He had not been running for that long, yet Gilbert already felt the muscles in his legs aching. 

”Keep going!” The German shouted once more. He knew that the exercise was far too strenuous for the Prussian, but he knew that the sooner he could train him, the quicker he would recover. “Come on, Gilbert!” 

Suddenly Gilbert felt his surroundings dull around him and once again was reliving his time in the east. 

He was walking a lot more slowly now, while his ankles screamed in pain with every step. Even though he wasn’t wearing the ball chain, he still felt imprisoned and unable to move very far. His bare feet were scratched and blackened from the coalmine that he was currently working under. The coal he was carrying with his bare hands was much too heavy to carry and the weight had made him stagger. 

”Why you stop?” A dreaded accented voice asked him. Gilbert spun around to meet the Russian who had brought him so much grief. “From what I’ve heard from your officials, you’re meant to be hard worker. I’m disappointed, Gilbert. I expect more from you.” 

”Aren’t you already satisfied?! We already surrendered to you. What is the point of me staying here?” Gilbert demanded, his voice sounding a lot less confident than he would have liked. 

”If I tell you, I kill you.” Ivan answered. After realising how corny his words were, he laughed heartily, the sound causing Gilbert to cringe. “Oh,” he sighed after his laughing fit “I haven’t had this much fun in years. You brighten my morning, Gilbert.” With that, he placed a hand on the Prussian’s cheek and gazed at him for a while. His violent eyes shone wickedly and Gilbert was unable to look anywhere else. A wave of nausea washed over him and Gilbert immediately felt ill as the purple irises pierced into his soul. 

”I wonder…” Ivan began but then he stopped himself with a smile “Never mind. Keep shifting the coal, da?” Much to Gilbert’s relief, he removed his hand and walked away slowly, laughing quietly to himself. 

”Was?!” 

Gilbert opened up his eyes. He was lying on the pavement and Ludwig was standing over him in bewilderment. A dull ache began to penetrate and spread in his head. “What happened to you?” Ludwig gasped. Placing a hand to Gilbert’s forehead, he pulled him up gently back on his feet. 

”You’re burning up.” The German said, his voice filled with dread. He was already regretting training Gilbert too early “I shouldn’t have pushed you too hard.” Ludwig muttered, allowing Gilbert to lean against him for support as they made their way back to the house. “You should have told me you weren’t feeling well.” 

Gilbert laughed bitterly “I’m too awesome to just skip exercise like that. I’m tough, Ludwig. I need to learn.” He gave a laugh, which broke off in a wheeze. “Why am I coughing for? I never do this…” He asked in amusement, trying to mask his own terror. Never had he felt so weak before. Turning back to Ludwig for an answer, he realised how furious and quiet his young brother had became. 

”What’s up West?” The albino asked, placing a hand on the German’s arm. 

”Don’t…” Ludwig snapped. 

”Don’t what?” Gilbert asked in puzzlement, trying to shake off the fear that was clouding his own mind. Ludwig turned to glare at Gilbert, his blue eyes bright with tears.

”Don’t joke like that, Gilbert. Why are you pretending for? Do you even care about getting better?!” Looking at the sorrowful, sunken red eyes was making him angry. It was all too much for him to witness Gilbert carry on in such a way. “I don’t want you to hide your emotions…” Ludwig said in a quieter voice “Stop pretending to be brave. You’re not on the battlefield anymore. You’re at home. With me. Your brother…” 

Gilbert’s pale face darkened, as he also became furious “Well since you want to know, fine I’ll tell you. I feel like death. Day in and day out. Useless, weak and dead. Happy now, Ludwig? You have your answer! When Ivan took me, I never thought that I would see the light of day ever again. But I didn’t want to tell you, because how would it concern you? You weren’t there. And you wouldn’t want to know what happened.” Seizing his own shirt violently he pulled it off and turned around to give Ludwig a proper look at his scarred back. The German’s eyes widened and the feeling of tremendous guilt returned. 

”Not so sexy anymore, huh?” Gilbert scoffed sarcastically. “Yes, feast your eyes, liebe bruder because this was what had happened to me. Thirty lashings. By a woman too. So, Ludwig I wonder. Why do you still care to help me? Look at me. I’m no longer attractive to you anymore. I can’t make you laugh anymore. All that had made me awesome was snatched away from me in the east. If you had just left me in the bath tub, we could have all just been spared of the pain.” 

”Shut up!” Ludwig shouted, startling the other momentarily. To Gilbert’s surprise he was suddenly standing directly in front of him. “Do you really think that matters to me?” The blond demanded, moving closer. Gilbert drew back nervously, prepared for a slap on the face. But against the Prussian’s instincts, his hand slowly met his face and rested gently on his cheek. 

”I know you’re still here somewhere, Brüderlein..” Ludwig whispered hopefully, his hand still resting on the albino’s cheek “Now stop this childish chatter.” Before he could stop himself, his lips brushed against Gilbert’s own bruised ones and they kissed tenderly, the first kiss since the unification. 

After Ludwig drew away, tears began to run down the Prussian’s face. “Oh West…” He trembled, unable to ignore the intense thumping of his heart. “It has been forever since you have ever kissed me in this way. I…I don’t know how I had stayed imprisoned for so long without you.” Against his control, the Prussian was sobbing against Ludwig’s chest, his bony hands clutching at the crisp army jacket. It was getting wrinkled, but for that moment, it didn’t seem to matter at all for Ludwig. The blond closed his eyes, the crease in his brow vanishing as he relaxed in Gilbert’s embrace. 

”Ich Liebe dich, Gilbert.” he sighed, his heart simultaneously joining the pace of his brother’s. 

”Ich Liebe dich mehr.” replied the other, his voice sounding slightly more certain with every word. “And I’ll try to prove myself to you, Ludwig. I promise you.” 

As the days passed by, Gilbert had gradually gained more weight. Through Ludwig’s strenuous training and good food, the Prussian was looking stronger and healthier and more like his old self. After one very hot afternoon, Gilbert had decided to take a rest under the shade of the tree. 

”That’s enough exercise for today.” Ludwig said finally, panting as he caught up with him. Sweating furiously, he dabbed his face with a part of his singlet. As he lifted his shirt, Gilbert took a glimpse at the hard rock abs that was beneath the black material. Seeing the older man’s curiosity, he blushed and put his singlet down again. A familiar and shameful feeling of lust came back to him as he looked at his brother, causing his eyes to dart to the ground. 

”Guess we should head back now, ja?” Gilbert asked, wondering why Ludwig had quickly looked so uncomfortable. They made it back to the house without another word. Although he had avoided complete eye contact with the Prussian, Ludwig was still unable to ignore the sensation that was spreading beneath him. Shutting the bathroom door loudly, the blond quickly stripped himself of his garments and turned on the shower. He lathered himself quickly with soap, attempting to focus his mind on cleaning himself than thinking about the intent gaze that the scarlet eyes were giving him outside. Secretly, Ludwig was pleased with the Prussian’s improvement, although he had not really acknowledged it. Even though they had been together before, Ludwig tried to bury any feelings of old affection, knowing that Gilbert was still recovering. It would have been much too overwhelming for the albino, if he had given him any more romantic indications. The first kiss they had shared since Gilbert’s return was the only thing Ludwig could give. 

But as his strong hands rubbed against his thighs, the carnal desire intensified. Before he could stop himself, his eyes were closed as he imagined the Prussian’s hands cleaning him instead. The red eyes in his mind were filled with a burning lust that his body was experiencing and he gasped as he imagined the smooth, white hands moving closer to his lower regions. Under the rushing of water, Ludwig moaned quietly as he touched himself. He knew that what he was feeling was wrong, but at least alone, Gilbert would have no idea about his yearning fantasy. 

But enveloped in the warmth of the shower and the sensuous touch, Ludwig did not hear the bathroom door open, or the figure that had slipped in. The German finally reached his climax, unable to hold back his moan. But the moment of pleasure was cut short by a sudden shock, as Gilbert had pulled the curtain aside. 

”G-Gilbert….” Ludwig was too speechless to be angry with the albino. The Prussian was completely naked, his brilliant porcelain form looking more attractive with his regained muscles. “Why….Why didn’t you knock?” 

Gilbert gave a wide smile, amused by the younger man’s awkwardness. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know anyone was here.” He smirked. Already noticing Ludwig’s erection, he barged into the shower roughly, pushing him up against the tiles. The German’s heart was pounding and he blinked several times to make sure that Gilbert wasn’t a figure of his imagination. 

”Don’t be ashamed…”Gilbert drawled “Keep touching yourself. I know you enjoyed it.” 

”Wha-” Ludwig stammered as the Prussian’s hands began to sweep over his chest. “I…I didn’t!” he lied quickly. But Gilbert knew otherwise. 

”Come on, West. Don’t hide your emotions from me…You told me that once before, remember? Why don’t you take your own advice?” As he said this, he began to fondle at Ludwig’s chest, grinning at the hardened nipples. The German blushed, noticing Gilbert’s own erection now pressing against him. 

”I know you want it…” the Prussian whispered seductively “I want it too, can you feel that? So don’t hide. Beg for me, bruder. I want you to beg me to touch you. Kommen und mir gehorchen.” The same gaze from beneath the tree returned and Ludwig could no longer contain himself. A moan escaped his lips as Gilbert’s hands moved closer to his eager member. 

”Ja…Bitte.” He whispered, trembling while the Prussian’s lips met his exposed neck “Please…Please touch me.” 

Gilbert began to stroke him and kissed his neck roughly, leaving bite marks on his unblemished skin. “Ah…” Ludwig groaned, gripping at Gilbert’s back. He could still feel the lashings, although they were not as deep as they were before. 

”Kleiner bruder…Ich will dich.” The albino panted. At Gilbert’s words, the German began to reciprocate the other’s actions. They continued for a while in heated excitement, not even noticing how cold the water was getting. After they came together, Gilbert kissed Ludwig passionately, wrapping his slimmer legs around the blond’s more muscular form. 

A few minutes later, they were lying on Ludwig’s bed together, not even bothering to change into some fresh clothes. They shared another intense kiss, rubbing their bare bodies against one another. Ludwig cherished the touch and took the chance to explore his brother’s improved shape, running his rough hands over the hardened stomach. Gilbert lay as the blond planted kisses down his body. He closed his eyes, experiencing a feeling of utmost bliss that he had not experienced in a long time. 

But after he opened his eyes, it was Ivan, not his brother who was prodding at his bare form. 

”You may be terrible worker, but you can be good entertainment, like whore.” Ivan remarked in his harsh Russian accent. “You have slender body, like woman. Good for sleeping with.”

”Get your hands off me.” Gilbert tried to whisper, yet it came out as more of a whimper, like that of an injured dog. He was standing in the dungeon, his ankle locked in the ball chain. The metal bit into his flesh painfully and for a moment he worried that he might run the risk of losing his foot. 

”But Gilbert. You didn’t have problem with other women touching you… Or men.” he added sneakily “I read your file and it says you are quite the playboy.”

”So you want to sleep with me? Is that it?” Gilbert hissed. He knew that Ivan was demanding something indecent from him. Why else would he drag him away from Germany and into his home? 

Ivan slowly stroked the fine, silvery strands of the Prussian’s hair. He tugged at a clump, causing him to cry out in pain.

”Anyone can sleep with cheap whore.” Ivan explained “But I am more respectable than that. I want you to be more for me. Yet to do that, I need your obedience.” He yanked Gilbert’s hair again. Tears welled in his eyes as the Russian stared at him with his blinding violet gaze. Gilbert’s stomach lurched and he quickly covered his mouth, trying to keep the bile down. Ivan placed a hand on his bare shoulder as if to comfort him. 

”Does looking at me really make you feel sick?” Ivan asked, a wicked smile appearing on his lips “Not to worry, Gilbert. With obedience, you will no longer be afraid. I will guide you. You were a German soldier, so it will be easy for you to respect authority.” 

"I’m not respecting anyone like you." Gilbert replied nastily. As soon as he said this, his belly met a strong blow and he was clutching his stomach, retching on the cold, hard floor. 

”Is it because I am Russian?” Ivan smirked “No worry. You will learn to become one like us. It will be easy. But if you resist, you make my job harder and you make life harder for yourself.” Suddenly, his eyes lit up as an idea came to him. “From reading these files, I wonder whether your brother will be more obedient than you…” 

”YOU KEEP AWAY FROM MY BROTHER!” Gilbert yelled. He was shaking violently in a mix of rage and terror “I don’t care what the hell you want to do with me. Just leave my brother alone.” 

Ivan gave another hearty chuckle “Incredible. As soon as you brother is mentioned, you become less stubborn and more willing. You must really love him.” He slipped his hands over Gilbert’s bare back, digging his nails into the lashings. The Prussian cried at the unbearable pain, unable to think about anything else. 

”You will become one with me.” Ivan whispered menacingly, digging his nails deeper into the flesh. Everything blurred around Gilbert as he felt himself grow weaker and weaker, waiting for the ground to open up from beneath him. 

The Prussian’s eyes fluttered open as he woke up in a sweat. Ludwig sat up quickly beside him and had placed a hand on his shoulder “Are you okay?” He asked worriedly “You were crying in your sleep.” 

At the soothing sound of his brother’s voice, Gilbert relaxed. “Ludwig…” he answered slowly, wrapping his arms around the other’s broader shoulders “I…I can’t escape him.” A tear slid down his cheek as he hid his face in Ludwig’s chest “I can’t…I can’t…Es tut Mir leid.” He broke down into a series of sobs, refusing to look at the blue eyes that were addressing him with concern, as if he was bird with broken wings. He felt angry that there was still room for such traumatising events in a moment of tranquil, tender love. Not only did he show weakness to Ivan, but also he was revealing it more and more to Ludwig. There was nothing worse than showing his vulnerability to the one he had loved most in the world. Like a bird with broken wings, he had lost his ability to fly and it was still too difficult to come to terms with it. 

Ludwig tried to embrace him, but Gilbert untangled himself from his grasp and had shifted on his side. “Please forgive me.” He mumbled, “I just can’t do this. Not right now.” The younger blond nodded understandably. Just as he had dreaded, it was all too soon.

”I know.” he replied solemnly, wrapping the blanket around his body. His nakedness was making him feel guilty and he was already regretting that moment they had shared together in the shower. He had treasured that time, but sadly it was too good to last, for it was still early days. 

For the rest of the week, Ludwig avoided the Prussian as much as he could, choosing to hide away in his study. He busied himself with paperwork from the *EU, keeping in mind that his duties as a nation were paramount. As he scanned through a form, he grabbed a pen to take some notes. Yet while he did this, he paused for a moment as his fingers touched the American flag that was printed on the side. He sighed as his azure eyes flickered to the window.

It was not very long ago when the German was crouched on the ground near the rubble. Even though he was no longer wearing his uniform, he knew that the Americans would not want anything to do with him. He was still hurt from the destruction, although his scratched leg and bleeding brow was nothing compared to the injuries that his companions were suffering…not that he had many companions left. The chancellor of his country had killed himself and all was lost. People had no more jobs as most of the factories were destroyed and there were no homes to go to. Germany would need years to build up again to its former glory. So many families were torn apart or killed. It saddened Ludwig, but as a high-ranking officer and a close associate to the late Führer, he needed to focus on building the country up again. There was no time for tears, no time for nostalgia for old times. Emotions were an unnecessary distraction. 

”Hey!” 

Ludwig looked up quickly, but through the morning smog, he couldn’t see anyone else. 

”Hey!” the voice shouted again, louder this time. The German squinted in the fog, until he noticed a tall, proud figure walking closer to him. A young man, not much older than himself was coming out of the smog. He was wearing a dark green uniform, heavily decorated with badges, like Ludwig’s uniform used to be. However, these were not the badges of the Schutzstaffel, or the fatherland. With a wide grin and bright, boyish, bespectacled eyes Ludwig recognised the man to be none other than a commander of the American army. 

”The name’s Alfred Jones.” the man said, holding out a hand. The German hesitated for a moment, but then accepted it. Alfred’s handshake was strong and warm and Ludwig felt a little more comfortable. Despite being an enemy, he seemed to be harmless. 

”Ludwig…Ludwig Beilschmidt.” he answered quickly, feeling ashamed with how the American was able to wear his badges with pride. After all that had happened, Ludwig was much too embarrassed to wear the swastika on his body again. 

“Anymore of you guys still around?” Alfred asked curiously. Ludwig looked downcast, as the question had emphasised how bitter reality was for him.

”No..” he answered, trying to disguise the anger in his voice. “Most of my men are dead. My brother and some of the officials are still in office, but that’s about all. Do you need to speak to them?” 

”Oh yeah! Sure!” Alfred replied enthusiastically “I need to speak to as many of you as I can. You see, I have to discuss something of a serious matter with you.” 

Ludwig shrugged “I don’t have a car.” He said, “So it’ll be quite a walk.” 

”Nah, it’s fine. I can do with the exercise.” The American responded casually. “You see I want to give a bit of a peace offering. Whatever happened in the past, we should just forget about it. I think we should start afresh. This is…I mean, was a huge industrialising nation so I think it would be beneficial to you, me and the rest of the world if you accept my proposal.”

Ludwig backed away “I’m not sure what you mean exactly.” 

Alfred laughed, slapping a hand on his back “Nah, nah man. I don’t mean THAT kind of proposal. What I mean is would you be willing to accept some *financial aid? Just so we can forget the war and build up the world again.” 

Ludwig thought for a moment. Normally he would have chosen to work on things alone. Although Germany had improved since the war, it was still not quite as good as it used to be. However, this was an opportunity to start over, without any more guilt from the war. Maybe this time, Ludwig would choose to accept someone’s help. 

”Your idea had credibility and good intentions, Mr Jones. But it would be better to discuss this more thoroughly with the rest of the officials.” Ludwig answered, choosing his words carefully. 

”That’s cool.” Alfred replied cheerily. The two continued walking for a few more minutes until they had reached the Reichstag. It was a sorry sight, for it was only partially refurbished after the war. However, Ludwig opened the door swiftly, ignoring the incompleteness and led Alfred inside. 

They reached a large room where only an oak table had sat in the centre of it. The other officials were there, addressing the foreigner with serious, but curious eyes. At first, they were reluctant to listen to such a casual, laid back commander but after hearing Alfred’s intentions, they all seemed to accept his idea. From a few more discussions, a contract was produced by the American for the officials to sign. Blushing as he checked his bare pocket, Ludwig realised that he had forgotten to bring a pen. But Alfred, noticing the other’s embarrassment, smiled and took out a pen from his own decorated pocket. 

”Thank you…” Ludwig said gratefully as he took the pen to sign. He was about to return it to Alfred, but the American shook his head. 

”Nah, you can keep it. You need it more than I do.” Ludwig was about to stiffly return the smile when one of the younger German colleagues came running in. 

”Herr Beilschmidt!” called the young man breathlessly. Everyone looked up in alarm as they witnessed the shock in the man’s tone. “Herr Beilschmidt! This is an emergency. Your brother. I can’t find him! He didn’t show up in the office today.” 

At that moment, Ludwig’s heart thumped so quickly that he had almost fainted. He stumbled, but one of the other men quickly grabbed him by the arms to help him steady his balance. 

”Where…Where is he?” The blond asked anxiously. 

”I don’t know!” The young man cried desperately “I didn’t see him, but I saw some men walk out of the building earlier. They didn’t look like Germans…I think they were speaking in Russian. They all got into some huge truck which drove away.” 

It all made sense to the Germans now. The Russians had not left east yet, although it didn’t seem like they would any time soon. Ludwig furrowed his brow in exasperation, for Germany was still under danger. 

From that event, everything had suddenly become more difficult to bear. 

Back in the present time, Ludwig had turned back to the American pen in his hand and continued with the paperwork. Even though it was quite some time ago, the event still seemed so clear to him. He continued working for thirty minutes, until a hesitant knock seized his attention. 

”Come in.” Ludwig called. Gilbert walked in, carrying a tray of lunch. The younger man’s eyes widened. He was not expecting anything so considerate, especially from the Prussian. 

”Hey West.” Gilbert said with a small smile, placing the food in front of him “I figured that you were hungry.” 

”You didn’t have to go to all that trouble.” Ludwig grumbled. He felt awful for avoiding Gilbert, but whenever he stood near him, he had the urge to kiss him and to hold him in his arms. However, with the older man’s relatively fragile state, he had to prevent such feelings taking control of him. 

”Aw, come on. You’ve been working all afternoon,” Gilbert replied with a smile. A warm feeling swept through Ludwig as he saw this. Smiles were so rare that it so pleasant to see some more traces of his brother’s older self. 

”Danke..” He said gratefully, taking a wurst from the plate. To his surprise, Gilbert took a seat on the desk, directly in front of him. The scarlet eyes were on him for a while, watching him in quiet admiration. Ludwig felt his face grow hot as he tried to look away. Even in the corner of his eye, he could see a long, muscular arm, as white as porcelain. The arm extended towards him and Gilbert’s smooth hand was in the German’s hair, stroking it lovingly. 

”I’m worried about you.” Gilbert said abruptly “You keep on avoiding me. Have I done something wrong?” 

”I’ve just been busy.” Ludwig mumbled, too embarrassed to reveal why he was really hiding from him. 

Gilbert looked at the papers. “The EU?”

”Ja..” Ludwig confirmed “Very important stuff.” 

The Prussian continued to study at the document. “I can help you with this, you know.” He admitted bitterly “I’m not that useless.” 

Ludwig sighed tiredly and took off his spectacles “I never said you were, Gilbert. I just didn’t want to worry you.” 

”Because of what had happened with me in the east?!” Gilbert realised, his voice rising. 

”Well…” Ludwig struggled; tense that he was upsetting the albino. He finally faced his brother properly, his blue eyes welling with tears. Apart from his angry expression, Gilbert looked strikingly handsome. Ludwig blinked, astounded by his remarkable recovery. It was as if he had never been malnourished, as if the time in the east had never occurred. But it was the memories, which still existed. 

He swallowed “I didn’t think you were ready yet…You’re forgetting that I still need you to help me rebuild our nation, I’ve only done one part but I need you to help me with the rest.” 

Gilbert looked astonished and the madness in his face seemed to melt away. “West…” He began hesitantly “…Do you really need my help? You seem to have solved most of it anyway.” 

"Yes, you dummkopf." Ludwig answered, "You know I do. There’s still a lot of work to do." he grabbed the American pen and threw it at Gilbert, who caught it. "Now get to work." He ordered. 

The Prussian gave a big smile, which had made him more beautiful. It was an order that he was more than happy to follow. Ludwig shyly smiled back and was about to look back down, until Gilbert had grabbed him by the chin and kissed him swiftly on the mouth. 

”Vielen dank, West.” 

At first, Gilbert seemed to be unfamiliar about the statistics and graphs that the papers showed, but after a while he figured it out. Ludwig looked at the Prussian, amazed at his utmost concentration. Despite being more laid back than his brother, Gilbert would often work hard on a certain task efficiently, if it were something that had interested him. Rebuilding the country to Gilbert was something that he had wanted to achieve, more than anything. He not only had wanted to perform this duty for the German people, but this was something that he had wanted to do for Ludwig. For the man that had helped him so much…For the man he loved. 

After they had finished work for the day, Ludwig shuffled a few of the papers together. Gilbert stood in the doorway, waiting for him. 

”Oh it’s okay.” Ludwig said dismissively “You can go to bed.” Gilbert walked closer to the German, the scarlet pools in his eyes intensifying.

”No, West.” he said “I don’t want to go to bed alone…I want to sleep beside you tonight.”

Ludwig was taken aback “But I though it was too soon…” 

”I don’t want to sleep alone…” Gilbert pleaded, “I know I freaked out last time, but I rather stay with you.” His tone was frantic as he clasped Ludwig tightly “Don’t leave me. I feel like I’m back in that cell. Ivan will come after me…” 

”Ivan already lost, Gilbert.” Ludwig explained firmly “The wall came down between us, remember? He has no intention of coming back.” 

”How could you be so sure?” The albino demanded, “He wanted me to join him. Why would he give up now?” 

The question hung unanswered in the air, for even Ludwig did not know how to respond. He still had no idea about Ivan’s intentions for Gilbert. Shrugging, he turned to the door, feeling sympathetic towards the Prussian.

“Are you coming, or what?”

Lying beside his brother, Gilbert’s eyes filled with tears as he remembered the imprisonment in the east. Ivan had seemed so intent on making him join forces. The scars and bruises on his body may have faded, but he could still recall every time he had disobeyed or made an error and every beating he had received for doing so. He remembered all the long, laborious days of shifting coal in the mines to being interrogated and assaulted by the Russian every evening. Or did it happen the other way around? There were no windows in Ivan’s place, nor was there any shafts of light within the deep abysses of the mines. Gilbert had lost all sense of time. The outside world had faded before his very eyes, West Germany being hidden away behind a thick, grey wall. He had never seen it until the day of his escape, but he would recall Ivan telling him about it from what he had read in the newspaper. 

”You see, Gilbert?” Ivan asked, pointing at a murky black and white article. All the text was in Russian of course, so he had no way of fully understanding it.

”It says that your country has been divided..And your brother has joined forces with America.” Ivan explained. He folded the paper and placed it into one of the deep pockets of his big coat. 

”Your brother has moved on. He does not care for you, or the east. He wants deal with America, not you or me. He does not care for us. Nobody cares for us.” Ivan laughed loudly as he touched his scarf, his eyes shining demonically “You know what is so funny about all of this? It was you who had once done me wrong.”

”I don’t know what you mean.” Gilbert answered curtly. 

Ivan chuckled and ruffled the Prussian’s hair roughly, tugging it painfully. “Let me refresh your memory. You were once proud in your Fascist uniform, marching in with big black boots, telling me that we would take Poland. East for you and West for me, you said. Then, you turned your back on me and took all Poland! You did not follow deal! You were being naughty. So now I take east back…and the man who lied.”

With a flourish, he pulled off his scarf, revealing a long, hideous scar. It only occurred to Gilbert that it was the first time he had ever seen Ivan’s bare neck. 

”Your men also left me this. Not very nice present for me after breaking deal.” 

”I was only following orders!” Gilbert exclaimed “I did not mean to do what I did. My chancellor gave me no choice.” 

Ivan traced Gilbert’s cheek with a gloved hand. Gilbert shivered violently, his stomach in his mouth and his heart beating as quickly as a rabbit’s. 

”You like to follow orders, da? Well, I’d like to offer you something. Take off your clothes.”

”No!” Gilbert shouted.

”Okay then, I will.” Ivan answered calmly. He grabbed on Gilbert’s arms, pulling up the ragged shirt that he was wearing. The Prussian struggled, but the other was too strong. After stripping him down to his underwear, he reached up to the bars and brought down a box. 

He placed it in front of Gilbert. “Here’s present for you.” Ivan said, gesturing at it. Reluctantly, the albino opened the box. To his horror, it was the Soviet uniform. 

”I want you to wear it. There is no need for you to wear your old rags for tonight. You must look good for Big Brother Russia now. Go on.” 

Gilbert shook his head, causing Ivan to smack him straight in the jaw. A throbbing pain spread below his face. 

”How about now?” 

”No!” He shouted again. Ivan looked up to the cell opening. The bars were lifted as a group of masked soldiers climbed in, all wearing the same uniform. Together, they had beaten Gilbert until his lip was swollen and he was almost unconscious. Then after they left, Ivan dressed Gilbert himself, knowing that he was too weak and unwilling to do it alone. 

”Perfect.” Ivan beamed as he placed the cap on him. “You look like one of us now. I am happy.” He brushed his hands against Gilbert sensually and kissed him so roughly on the mouth that the prisoner’s lip bled. As Gilbert lay weakly, Ivan climbed over his body appreciatively and began removing his pants. 

As Ivan assaulted him, the Prussian writhed, fighting against the urge to be ill. The madness in the violet eyes was terrifying, but he was unable to move away from it. Even with his eyes shut, the glare had left a glowing imprint behind his eyelids. He couldn’t scream or cry as the horrible, painful ordeal continued for a few more minutes. He merely accepted it, just as an obedient soldier of his rank should. He accepted it for the safety of his country…and the safety for his brother. Anything for Ivan to stay away from Ludwig. 

That was his duty. 

After Ivan had left, Gilbert awoke with his body numb and the Soviet uniform ripped. He felt incredibly dirty and repulsive. As he limped to the basin to wash his face, he couldn’t stop shaking. Slowly, he undressed to clean himself. It was hard to ignore the stickiness between his thighs and the unbearable pain within his lower regions. Even after he had finished cleaning himself, he still felt impure. Still, he dressed himself back into the work rags and waited until the guard released him for another day in the coalmines.

The only thing left for him now was to survive…but from all that had happened, Gilbert did not feel like he was going to. He felt too ruined and humiliated to ever come back. 

Back in the days when Ludwig was still a child, Gilbert used to tell stories of his heroic exploits. 

”Ich bin unsterblich.” He would say with a proud grin. To the small boy, he really did seem invincible, able to tackle whatever obstacles, which came his way. Ludwig used to be proud of his older brother and his big blue eyes would widen in wonder, as Gilbert would tell of one of his journeys, back when he had led the Prussian army. “What happened next? Bitte, brüderlein. Tell me what happened then?”

”It’s time for you to go to sleep. Tomorrow I’ll tell you more about the awesome warrior. Gute nacht, Ludwig.” 

“Gute nacht, liebe bruder.” Ludwig would say before turning around to go to sleep. 

As Gilbert stood in the mine, he blinked, brushing away that old memory. There was no time for emotions. No time for tears. Lifting the coal, he continued working. 

Suddenly, heavy footsteps behind him made Gilbert stop cold in his tracks. A figure walked closer and closer to him and wrapped large, sleeved arms around him. A dull white scarf slid closer to Gilbert’s mouth, pushing its way through his lips and then down his throat. He gasped, unable to breath. 

“You become one with me?” 

Gilbert woke up with a start, panting and sweating as if he had run a mile. Ludwig’s arms, rather than Ivan’s, were wrapped around him instead. He breathed a sigh of relief, but after lying for a while, he climbed out of bed, careful not to wake the younger German. 

No matter how many times he had told himself that he was safe, the memories of the east would always haunt his mind. The Prussian walked to the bathroom to splash water on his face and gazed at his dripping features in the mirror. He did look a lot better than how he had used to, before the wall had came down. But why did he still feel the same vulnerability? 

After he had left the bathroom, he stood near the window, too anxious to go back to sleep. Ludwig’s eyes were still shut, perhaps dreaming of more pleasant things. Gilbert walked over to his brother’s sleeping form and stroked his face tenderly. With his fringe down and partially over his eyes, Ludwig looked significantly younger than usual and this made Gilbert all the more willing to stand at his bedside, just like old times. 

Watching Ludwig, it all dawned on him. The German had nursed him back to health, allowed him to work in the EU with him…He told him not to hide his emotions. Regardless what the Russian had said, Ludwig had proved him wrong every time. He did not ask for much, only for the truth from Gilbert, yet he was refused many times. But even though the Prussian had continued to push him away, Ludwig was still ready to take him back in his arms and forgive him. 

Why am I not listening to my own brother? Gilbert thought in surprise. I’ve been following everything Ivan has told me. I had let him win and become one with my thoughts. The thoughts of realisation continued to race through his mind as he looked at the young blond. 

Mein bruder. Gilbert thought, his scarlet eyes filled with regret, I had been dishonest to you all along. Now I must tell you this story about myself. A story when I was not so invincible… 

After Ludwig had awoken, he saw the older Prussian standing solemnly in the doorway. Surprised that his brother had woken up earlier, he gave a short nod of approval. 

”I take it that you are ready for this morning’s exercise, ja?” 

”West…There is something I have to tell you.” Gilbert said quickly, getting straight to the point “It can’t wait.”

To Ludwig’s dismay, the albino on a closer inspection did not look like he had slept at all. Dark rings circled his red eyes and he had looked even more pale than usual. “Please, Ludwig. Listen to me before I lose my nerve.”

The German’s attention was seized “I’m listening, Gilbert.” He replied. It worried him to see his brother in such a state so he patted a seat beside him on the bed for the older man to sit down. 

As soon as Gilbert sat down, the words came pouring out immediately, like water flooding out of the broken floodgates. He apologised profusely to Ludwig, telling him everything from his disorientation in a Russian van to Ivan’s cruel imprisonment, interrogation and beatings that had followed. He detailed the tiring labour of working at the mines that had never shown sunlight and then being forced to wear the Soviet uniform. Gilbert cried as he retold Ivan’s traumatising, sexual torture and all the feelings of disgust and guilt he had experienced. He felt ashamed, but Ludwig didn’t even move or scold him. The blond just sat patiently and listened. 

”How did you escape?” Ludwig asked quietly, after a few minutes of awkward silence. It was a question he had been dying to ask for so long, and now seemed like the perfect chance.

Gilbert closed his eyes and recalled the last day that Ivan had spoke to him.

He had been unusually generous to him and offered a proper meal, instead of just small portions of bread and water. Sitting beside him, he began to speak of his own true feelings. 

”I had always wanted to go out to see sun one day.” Ivan said, his eyes shining. For the first time, his gaze had not made Gilbert ill. He seemed harmless for a change, like a polite but awkward human being. ” I like flowers. Big flowers with bright colours. Sunflowers are my favourite. But where I live, nothing grows here. I sometimes see these in books, but it is never enough for me.”

The Russian stood up and beckoned Gilbert to follow him. The cell bars were lifted and they climbed up into a corridor. Ivan then led the Prussian upstairs to a room. It was the first time Gilbert was ever allowed upstairs. In contrast to the cell, it looked like a normal lounge-room. There were large, soft chairs, a small coffee table and a bookshelf. But something was missing and Gilbert had found the courage to ask about it. 

”Where are the windows?” 

Ivan gave a sad smile and walked over to the far right of the room. Before him, there was an intricate painting of what had looked like an open window, showing a field of sunflowers. 

”This is window here.” Ivan said in a small voice. He laughed “Well, I know it’s not real one…But it is better than looking out in wasteland where nothing grows. Sometimes, fantasy is better than reality, Gilbert.” 

The Prussian thought for a moment and realised a way he could escape. 

”How about if I show you the sunflowers?” Gilbert asked, thinking quickly. “Near the border, there are plenty.” 

Ivan shook his head in disbelief “I don’t think there would be anything there, Gilbert. My men have said nothing about sunflower garden.”

”But you haven’t been there yourself…Have you?” Gilbert questioned “How do you know what is there if you haven’t seen it with your own eyes?” 

The captor frowned and considered the albino’s words. He turned to look back at the painted window, but Gilbert’s persistence caused him to hesitate.

”Ivan…I can take you there.” he faked a smile as he placed a hand on Ivan’s arm, as if he was asking the other out on a date. It made him feel nauseous doing this, but this was probably the only chance he could ever escape. Time was running out and he realised that he was much too weak to think of any other options. “Come on, Ivan.” Gilbert beckoned, his tone too sweet for his liking “Let me show you. We are together now, aren’t we? You trust me, don’t you? I trust you. It’s just like what you said. Nobody cares about us…but you care for me, I know you do. Nothing else matters.” He moved closer to the Russian and gave him a seductive smile. A splitting headache threatened to crumble his act, but he was still able to suppress the pain. 

Ivan blushed shyly but nodded slowly, too awkward to react at Gilbert’s uncharacteristic, but desirable display. 

”Okay.” He whispered “Take me there.” 

Gilbert then told Ludwig of the way he had packed helped Ivan pack for a picnic. He revealed how he had tucked a knife in his pants, under a shirt while Ivan’s back was turned and continued to act affectionately to his captor as they made their way outdoors.

It was a grey morning, yet there was a slight warmness in the air. Whatever he was about to do would either endanger his life or assist his survival. Ivan had instructed his men to provide him a car to drive in, without anyone around. He did not want anyone interrupting them while they had their romantic picnic in the sunflower garden. 

They drove for a while until they had arrived closer to the border. After they had arrived at their destination, Gilbert led Ivan out to a few trees that still had their leaves, trying to ignore the barren landscape that was surrounding them. 

” We can sit here for a while…” Gilbert said tensely “And then I’ll show you the sunflowers.” 

Ivan looked at Gilbert with uncertainty. It hurt him to see the look of betrayal on Ivan’s face as he realised that he was being tricked “There are no sunflowers here, Gilbert. Are there?” 

The Prussian threw his arms around Ivan “No.” He admitted finally “I’m sorry.” Lurching forward, he kissed Ivan on the mouth suddenly as his hand readied the knife. 

Without a trace of hesitation, he stabbed the Russian straight into the stomach. Ivan groaned softly as he clutched at his stomach and doubled over, face down. As soon as he hit the ground, Gilbert ran, quicker than he had ever run his entire life. Running away from the traumatising past and into a better future. Even if he had not made his way back alive, at least he would not have to die in Ivan’s clutches. He just had to get away. 

”And that’s when I saw you…” Gilbert concluded. “You found me, even though I thought that all was lost. See, Ludwig? Do you understand why I couldn’t tell you before? I’m a coward.” He wept as Ludwig held him. 

"Warum liebst du mich?" Gilbert sobbed, not even understanding why his brother was being so forgiving "I’ve done so much wrong…And who knows what has happened to Ivan? He could be dead, or still going after me." 

”Ivan had taken advantage on you. He treated you like an animal. What you did was perfectly understandable.” Ludwig held Gilbert’s face in his hands, staring into his teary gaze “What’s more,” he continued “Is that you had sacrificed so much for the sake of your country…and for me. I don’t think I can ever show you how grateful I am for that. You have been brave, Gilbert more braver than I.” As Gilbert tried to protest, Ludwig silenced him with a kiss. 

”Nein.” He said sternly, leaning closely to the older Prussian so that their noses were touching “Du bist ein leben lang unsterblich…und ich liebe dich.”

It thrilled Gilbert to hear those very words that lifted his spirits. They kissed again, with more passion this time and found themselves undressing one another feverishly. As Gilbert lay on the bed, Ludwig climbed over his body slowly, gently caressing and avoiding contact with any bruises or scars on his body. Noticing how dainty Ludwig’s movements were, Gilbert gave an encouraging smile. “It’s okay. You can be harder with me.” Still, Ludwig was too hesitant.

“I don’t want to hurt you…”

The Prussian opened his legs with ease and took hold of the German’s hand, moving it over his body with more force. Since the time in the east, he was much too anxious to allow anyone to be intimate with him, but Ludwig was not Ivan. “It’s alright…” Gilbert murmured, “I trust you.” As Ludwig’s hand moved lower, Gilbert groaned appreciatively. He continued stroking him, faster this time and also felt himself becoming more excited as he watched the other’s face expression. The Prussian pulled him down and also began kissing him fiercely, running his hands over the German’s taut form. Skin upon skin and breath against one another, they were the closest that they could ever be since the unification. Gilbert managed to slide out from underneath the blond and was tackling him into the sheet. Ludwig froze, stunned at the albino’s unexpected strength. Gilbert steadied himself, ready for the other’s entrance.

“Wait..” Ludwig panted and quickly went over to a drawer to pull out a small jar of cream. Even though Gilbert was ready, he still wanted to do this gently, without creating any pain for him at all. He slathered a liquid substance over his pulsating member and then slid into the Prussian’s awaiting entrance. As soon as Gilbert felt the German within him, he moaned in pleasure. Gripping on Ludwig’s shoulders, he moved his hips, gradually quickening his pace. Following his brother’s words, Ludwig became more daring with his caresses and moved with more force and intimacy. Breathing became heavier and deeper as they moved closer and closer to their climax. All of the tumultuous events of the war, the destruction and Russia’s triumph had flown from Gilbert’s memory. The surrounding world had seemed meaningless, for it was the love for each other that was the most important. After they had came together in joint passion, Gilbert nestled against Ludwig’s chest as the German wrapped his strong arms around him. A pleasing and satisfying warmth penetrated through the older sibling, for it was the first time he had ever felt truly safe and satisfied in such close proximity to someone else. Through half-closed eyelids, Gilbert could see that Ludwig had felt the same.

Weeks later, they had returned back to the wall. It was mostly demolished, although one part of it still remained. For the first time since the fall, there were flowers growing everywhere in full bloom. But unlike that day, the street was empty, as most of the people had retreated into the inner centres. Grass had grown around and even through the cracks of the remains. Large and newly refurbished buildings filled the once empty wasteland.

Ludwig led the way down to where he had first met Gilbert and they stood and marvelled at how much their country had grown since the fall. It truly had looked so amazing that Gilbert had felt an overwhelming sense of joy. Never, since the escape from the east had he envisioned anything so wonderful and fulfilling. It wasn’t the same as the old Prussian kingdom, but it was still Germany, the Germany that he and his brother had worked towards building up.

“ Es ist ein schönes ausblick, ja?”

“Ja.” Ludwig agreed. 

But the German was not looking at the view…He was staring directly at Gilbert. The Prussian looked back at him in surprise, but he relaxed as the younger man moved closer towards him.

“The last time I stood here, I was so worried that I wasn’t going to see you again…” Ludwig said quietly, his face turning red in embarrassment “But you stood out so well from the crowd.” Slowly threading his fingers through the albino’s silvery hair, he shyly leaned closer. “…I thought that I was going to lose you, until that moment.”

Gilbert smiled, a wide and beautiful smile, which gave Ludwig’s stomach butterflies. “You wouldn’t lose me. I’m invincible, remember.” As he said this, his hand linked the other’s hand and he gazed into his love-struck, azure eyes.

“Ja. Okay. I have to admit that.” Ludwig grumbled a little, causing the other to chuckle. Even though Gilbert’s conceited nature had always bothered him, it was a relief to see the old Gilbert back. As their lips met, they kissed slowly, cherishing the moment of not only their unification, but also the beginning of their joyful life together.

Neither brother had regretted a single thing.

 

Epilogue:

A large, bulky figure clumsily slid through the city centre. In his big coat and messy hair, he seemed to blend in with the locals. Nobody knew that he was a foreigner who was once the sworn enemy of the country. The man walked down a path until he had reached the wall remains. As soon as his gaze had fallen on the Prussian who had escaped his clutches, his blood began to boil. He reached into his coat, ready to draw out something that would bring down his enemy, for once and for all…

But a bright object distracted his gaze. He had not noticed it from the corner of his eye and at first and was sceptical. Yet still, he turned anyway for a new, warm hope had stirred in his usually cold heart.

Growing out from between the cracks of the rubble, on the very end was a sunflower. It wasn’t a very large sunflower, as its bud had not fully opened, but it was a sunflower all the same. Tears began to brim in the man’s violet eyes as his hands quickly slipped from the weapon. He walked closer to the flower and grasped the stem gently between his gloved fingers. Inspecting the flower, he realised that he had not been deceived after all. As he surveyed the rest of the rumble, he noticed a small garden that he had not seen before. Sunflowers, daffodils, tulips and even a light scattering of brilliant blue cornflowers spread out near his boots. The man walked around the garden, smiling and even laughing to himself. He could not remember the last time he had been so happy.

“Braginski, do you still want us to capture him?” A harsh voice asked, breaking him from his childish joy.

The man turned around to see that one of his guards had managed to catch up to him.

“Nyet, Dmitri.” Ivan replied calmly. “I’d like some of these sunflowers actually. Could you pick some for me?”

The guard turned a deep red “W-what?!” He spluttered “I’m not walking around with flowers in my hand like girl!”

Ivan patted the man on the shoulder, making him to scowl “You are still under my order. Go on.”

As the guard reluctantly got down on his knees to pick the flowers, Ivan picked one of the largest sunflowers and turned to look back at the German couple in the distance. Neither had seen him, which did not bother him at all. Perhaps they had forgotten of his existence, but it was easier this way.

Everything that had happened in the east was suddenly not so important anymore. It was all just a distant memory now, for it was time to move on.

**Author's Note:**

> German translation key:
> 
> Fräulein: Usually a formal way to address a young woman, although this way of address is less common in recent years.
> 
> Guten Morgen: Good morning
> 
> Es tut Mir leid: I’m very sorry/ sorry from the bottom of my heart
> 
> Bitte: Please
> 
> Wurst: A German sausage
> 
> Gott verdammt: God damn it
> 
> Ja: Yes
> 
> Dummkopf: A derogatory term usually meaning a silly person
> 
> Bruder: Brother
> 
> Gute nacht: Goodnight
> 
> Bist du Verrückt? : Are you crazy?
> 
> Mutterficker: An expletive. I’m sure you can guess what it means. ;)
> 
> Russland: Russia
> 
> Oh mein gott: Oh my god
> 
> Was?!: What?
> 
> Liebe: Love/a title of endearment in this context
> 
> Brüderlein: Brother (formal)
> 
> Ich Liebe dich: I love you
> 
> Mehr: More
> 
> Ja: Yes
> 
> Kommen und mir gehorchen: Come and obey me
> 
> Kleiner: Smaller
> 
> Führer: A title for a leader. In this context, it is referring to Adolf Hitler.
> 
> Schutzstaffel: Abbreviated more commonly as the SS, this was a military organization, which was formed by Adolf Hitler and the Nazi party around WWII. 
> 
> Herr: Mr
> 
> Vielen dank: Thank you very much.
> 
> Unsterblich: Immortal/invincible. It is the title of the story and demonstrates the strength of not only Germany recovering after the war, but also Prussia’s own strength to overcome all the obstacles that he had faced.
> 
> Warum liebst du mich?: Why do you love me?
> 
> Du bist ein leben lang unsterblich: This loosely translates as “You are a life-long immortal”. Germany says this because his brother still appears strong and indestructible to him, just like how he used to when he was younger. I also was very much inspired by the title and lyrics of one of my favourite songs by the German band Eisbrecher. 
> 
> Es ist ein schönes ausblick, ja?: Here Prussia is basically commenting on how beautiful the view is.
> 
> Russian translation key (it’s really short because I barely know any Russian):
> 
> Nyet: No.
> 
> *Footnotes for historical explanations:
> 
> EU: The European Union. Germany, Italy and France were some of the first countries, which had joined together to form this alliance for political and economic purposes.
> 
> America’s assistance: This was in reference to the US Aid where America had helped Germany and many other Western European countries in recovering from the war. Russia was one of the countries, which had rejected US Aid as their economic structure and communist government was not compatible to the US. This in turn had led to the Cold War…However, that’s another story. ;)


End file.
